Karan Johar’s new movie -> Kolkata Knightriders ki kahani

Came across the new script of KJo’s upcoming movie titled -> Kolkata Knightriders ki kahani..

Its an Amazing script,  brialliantly written and very inspiring.Here’s a brief summary:

SRK hits 36 in the final over and helps KKR finally win the IPL. He steps in after all players leave him and only 10 remain. Dancing Katrina and dancing Deepika and more dancing dumb belles at Lord’s.

Later its revealed that SRK’s father was Don Bradman (played by Amitabh Bacchan) who dies just hours before the finals and wants KKR to win.

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Engineering Means Common Sense!

7 Engineers and 7 Doctors are going from PUNE to Mumbai. So both groups gather at Pune Station. Both groups are desperately trying to prove their superiority.

SCENE – 1 (PUNE- MUMBAI):

7 engineers take only 1 Ticket and 7 doctors buy all 7 tickets..
Doctors are desperately waiting for TC to come……

When TC arrives, All 7 Engineers get in one toilet so when TC knocks, one hand come out with the ticket and the TC goes Away….

NOW on return Journey All of them don’t get a direct Train to PUNE. So they all decide to take a Passenger till Lonavala, from there they can easily get a LOCAL to PUNE

SCENE  – 2 (MUMBAI – LONAVALA):

Doctors decided, “this time we will prove that we too are equal”….All 7 Doctors take 1 Ticket Engineers don’t buy any ticket at all!!!!!..

TC arrives….

ALL DOCTORS IN ONE TOILET.ALL ENGINEERS IN THE OPPOSITE.

One engineer gets out and knocks the door of Doctors toilet, One hand comes with the tickets, he takes the
ticket and comes in Engg. Bathroom… TC DRIVES out ALL the doctors from the toilet and they are heavily fined.

SCENE –  3 ( LONAVALA):

SO now both the group r on LONAVALA station. Doctors planning their move for last chance, they board the local to Pune.

This time doctors decide that they will play the same (1 ticket) trick.

ALL Doctors take 1 tickets…Engineers BUY all 7 tickets this time…

SO TC Comes.. All Engineers showed their tickets ………… ……. ….

Doctors are still searching for toilet in the LOCAL train……. ….

Conclusion: Technically intelligent people are geniuses, don’t mess with Engineers. 😀

Never Mess with a Rabbit in Helmet

Never Mess with a Rabbit in Helmet - Cartoon

Never Mess with a Rabbit in Helmet - Cartoon

Punctuality…..

A Priest was being honoured at his retirement dinner after 25 years in the parish. A leading local politician and   member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner.

However, he was delayed, so the Priest was asked to say a few words in the meanwhile. Not being prepared to speak then, he wondered for a minute and then decided to share his experience on the first day in the parish to highlight how one should not rush to conclusions.

‘I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss’s wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his neighbour. I was appalled.

But as the days went on I learned that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.’….

Just as the Priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk: ‘I’ll never forget the first day our parish Priest arrived,’  said the politician. ‘In fact, I had the honour of being the first person to go to him for confession.’

Moral : Never, Never, Never Be Late. 🙂

Office exercises to avoid sleep !!!

To avoid sleep…

Follow like this to ease your neck & shoulder painATT00001

Wa..wa.. aaa
ATT00002

Move to the right and then to the left
ATT00003

After that, move to the left and then to the right
ATT00004

Just follow. Don’t force yourself to do 360 degrees, 180 degreeswill do. Bend down a bit like you gonna faint. Repeat a few times till you’re bored
ATT00005

Grab anything on your desk and smash your head hard. If you are still sleepy smash harder
ATT00006

After that move your feet and swing your body a bit like this. Do it like
it’s nobody’s business and remember to smile
ATT00007

Move your feet and body just a bit like this…. Do it like there’s no problem at all…
ATT00008

And now more aggressive! Don’t bother about what others say
ATT00009

Let go of all your stress….
ATT00010

If your boss ask what you are doing, move your head slowly like this and tell them you’re dying in the office
ATT00011

When your boss walks off, get your colleague to join you and move your body like this. The more the merrier…
ATT00012

Finally, dance like a cat
ATT00013

If you are still sleepy despite all these, just grab your small pillow  and sleep under your desk (at your own risk) 🙂

They Walk Among Us….

Millionaire Contestant Makes Worst Use Of Lifelines Ever

NEW YORK – Idaho  resident Kathy Evans brought humiliation to her friends and family Tuesday when she set a new standard for stupidity with her appearance on the popular  TV show, ‘Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.’

It seems that Evans, a  32-year-old wife and mother of two, got stuck on the first question, and  proceeded to make what fans of the show are dubbing ‘the absolute worst use of  lifelines ever.’

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After being introduced to the show’s host Meredith Vieira,  Evans assured her that she was ready to play, whereupon she was posed with an  extremely easy $100 question. The question was: ‘Which of the following is the largest?’

A) A Peanut
B) An Elephant
C) The Moon
D) Hey, who  you calling large?

Immediately Mrs. Evans was struck with an all consuming panic as she realized that this was a question to which she did not  readily know the answer.

Hmm, oh boy, that’s a toughie,’ said Evans, as Vieira did her level best to hide her disbelief and disgust. ‘I mean, I’m sure  I’ve heard of some of these things before, but I have no idea how large they would be.

Evans made the decision to use the first of her three lifelines, the 50/50. Answers A and D were removed, leaving her to decide which was  bigger, an elephant or the moon. However, faced with an incredibly easy question, Evans still remained unsure.

Oh! It removed the two I was leaning towards!‘ exclaimed Evans.. ‘Darn. I think I better phone a friend.

Using the second of her two lifelines on the first question, Mrs.  Evans asked to be connected with her friend Betsy, who is an office  assistant.

Hi Betsy! How are you? This is Kathy! I’m on TV!‘ said Evans,  wasting the first seven seconds of her call. ‘Ok, I got an important question.  Which of the following is the largest? B, an elephant, or C, the moon. 15  seconds hun.
Betsy quickly replied that the answer was C, the moon. Evans  proceeded to argue with her friend for the remaining ten seconds.

Come on Betsy, are you sure?‘ said Evans. ‘How sure are you? Duh, that can’t be  it.

To everyone’s astonishment, the moronic Evans declined to take her friend’s advice and pick ‘The Moon.

I just don’t know if I can trust Betsy. She’s not all that bright. So I think I’d like to ask the audience,‘  said Evans.

Asked to vote on the correct answer, the audience returned 98%  in favor of answer C, ‘The Moon.’ Having used up all her lifelines, Evans then  made the dumbest choice of her life.

Wow, seems like everybody is against what I’m thinking,’ said the too-stupid-to-live Evans. ‘But you know, sometimes you just got to go with your gut. So, let’s see. For which is larger, an elephant or the moon, I’m going to have to go with B, an elephant.  Final answer.

Evans sat before the dumbfounded audience, the only one  waiting with bated breath, and was told that she was wrong, and that the  answer was in fact, C, ‘The Moon.

Caution…..they walk among us!
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This one is actually better! (No  comments needed!)

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Caution…..they walk among us!
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Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: ‘Free to good home. You want it, you take it.‘ For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it.  He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal.
It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: ‘Fridge for sale $50.

The next day someone stole it!

***They walk amongst us!***
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*One  day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone  shouted….’Look at that dead bird!‘ Someone looked up at the sky and  said…’where?


***They walk amongst us!***
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While looking at a house, my brother  asked the estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, ‘Does the sun rise in the north?‘ When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, ‘Oh, I don’t keep up with that  stuff


***They walk amongst us!***
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My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach. She drove down in a convertible, but ‘didn’t think she’d get sunburned because the car was moving‘.


***They walk amongst us!***
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My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it’s designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped She keeps it in the trunk.


***They walk amongst us!***
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I was hanging out with a friend  when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My  friend said, ‘Wouldn’t the chain rip out every time she turned her head?‘ I  had to explain that a person’s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned…


***They walk amongst us!***
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I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. ‘Now,‘ she asked me, ‘Has your plane arrived yet?‘….
(I work with professionals like this.)


***They walk amongst us!***
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While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. ‘Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t  think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.

***Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.!!!!!!!!

This is expected only from Indian Ladies…

They cannot miss their favorite T.V. Serial even if there is flood, storm, gale or earthquake!!!!

Look at the expression of worry on helpless Husband’s face near the door 😉

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