This is an Incredible story! Please read through to the end


In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from the University of Toronto .

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully.

He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

Funny

As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife,after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled.

Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Toronto Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing.

The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure.

He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder.

The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legsand slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

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Wondering WHY?? Its shocking!!! Read the enitire post…

Read the rest of this entry »

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ANISH DHUME’S CHAIN LETTER

This is another mail by Anish… The mail contains offensive language. I have filtered some.. but still viewer discretion advised 🙂

ANISH DHUME’S CHAIN LETTER

Hello, my name is Anish and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50
billion f@#king chain letters sent to me by people who actually
believe if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Scotland with
a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have
it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak
show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you,
and everyone to whom you send “his” email, $1000?

How stupid are we?

Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I’ll
get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!

What a bunch of bullshit.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and
sodomize me for not continuing a chain letter that was started by
St Peter in 5AD and later taken to the US of A by midget pilgrim
stowaways on the Endeavour

F@#k ’em!!

If you’re going to forward something, at least send me something
mildly amusing.

I’ve seen all the “send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this
poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a
nickel from some omniscient being” forwards about 90 times.

I don’t f@#king care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you’re actually
contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it’s our
own unpopularity.
The point being?

If you get some chain letter that’s threatening to leave you shagless
or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it’s funny, send it on.

Don’t piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in
Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead
elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per
letter he’ll receive if you forward this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow
morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume
your genitals.

Have a nice day.

Anish Dhume…
P.S:
Send me 15 bucks and then fuck off
If you find this to be an act of plagiarism,then again F@#K OFF!

Worth reading…

Another forwarded mail by Anish..

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their
heart.

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”

I said “WHAT??!! What was that?!”

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…
“You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?”

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit.

We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.”

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.”

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.”

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?”

I then said “honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.

You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either….but at least that bitch knows I’m smarter than her…………………… !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nice puzzle – try to crack it … (Anish Dhume Again!!)

Ladies & Gentlemen, presenting Anish Dhume at his Best…


PS. The Answer might SHOCK you!!

Once there was a bus conductor, who was very rude to his passengers.

One day a beautiful young girl, of around 18 years,tried to board

the bus,

but he didn’t stop the bus.

Unfortunately the beautiful young girl came under the bus and died

on the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who

in turn took him to the court.

The judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment.

He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in the

center of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room. The

conductor was strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to

him. But to everyone’s amazement, he survived. The judge decided to set him

free, and he returned to his profession.

After a few months, this time, a good lo! oking middle aged woman

tried to board the bus but the conductor didn’t stop the bus. Unfortunately,

this time also, the good looking middle aged woman came under the bus and

died on the spot.

Again angry passengers took him to the police station, who in turn

took him to the court. The judge took one look at the conductor and gave him

capital punishment. The Bus conductor was taken to the same electrocution

chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room and

a single banana peel at one corner of the room. He was strapped to the

chair and high voltage current was given to him. This time also to

everyone’s amazement, he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he

returned to his profession.

A couple of months later, an elderly gentleman tried to board the

bus. This time the Bus conductor, remembering his earlier experiences,

stopped

the b! us. Unfortunately the elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his

injuries. The conductor was taken to the police station and then to

the court, to the same judge. Though he hadn’t done anything wrong, but

considering his past record the judge decided to set an example and

gave him capital punishment. The Bus conductor was again taken to the same

electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center

of the room and a single banana peel at one corner of the room. He was

strapped to the chair and high voltage current was given to him. This time

he died instantly !!!!!!!!!!!

The question is why didn’t he die on the first two occasions, but died

instantly the third time??

Try to solve it yourselves. This is rather interesting and answer is

perfectly logical. If necessary read the puzzle once again.

! Still you couldn’t, Then see below………

Read the rest of this entry »

Re Defining English

This email was sent to me by my dear friend Anish a long time back… It has amused me since then and now here it is:

The English Language

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English
Language?

Let’s face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don’t fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn’t the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn’t the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn’t a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.