Office exercises to avoid sleep !!!

To avoid sleep…

Follow like this to ease your neck & shoulder painATT00001

Wa..wa.. aaa
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Move to the right and then to the left
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After that, move to the left and then to the right
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Just follow. Don’t force yourself to do 360 degrees, 180 degreeswill do. Bend down a bit like you gonna faint. Repeat a few times till you’re bored
ATT00005

Grab anything on your desk and smash your head hard. If you are still sleepy smash harder
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After that move your feet and swing your body a bit like this. Do it like
it’s nobody’s business and remember to smile
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Move your feet and body just a bit like this…. Do it like there’s no problem at all…
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And now more aggressive! Don’t bother about what others say
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Let go of all your stress….
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If your boss ask what you are doing, move your head slowly like this and tell them you’re dying in the office
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When your boss walks off, get your colleague to join you and move your body like this. The more the merrier…
ATT00012

Finally, dance like a cat
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If you are still sleepy despite all these, just grab your small pillow  and sleep under your desk (at your own risk) 🙂

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Here i am sitting in my office @ night… Thinking hard about life…

Here i am sitting in my office @ night… Thinking hard about life…

  • How it changed from a maverick collage life to strict professional  life……
  • How tiny pocket money changed to huge monthly paychecks, but then why it gives less happiness…..
  • How a few local denim jeans changed to new branded wardrobe, but then why there are less people to use them
  • How a single plate of samosa changed to a full Pizza or burger, but then why there is less hunger…..

Here i am sitting in my office @ night… Thinking hard about life… How it changed…..

  • How a bike always in reserve changed to bike / car always on, but then why there are less places to go on……
  • How a small coffee shop changed to cafe coffee day,  but then why it feels like the shop is far away…..
  • How a limited prepaid card changed to postpaid package, but then why there are less calls & more messages……

Here i am sitting in my office @ night… Thinking hard about life… How it changed…..

  • How a general class journey changed to Flight journey, but then why there are less vacations for enjoyment….
  • How a old assembled desktop changed to new branded laptop, but then why there is less time to put it on……….
  • How a small bunch of friends changed to office mates, but then why after 6’o Clock it always feel like  getting late….

Here i am sitting in my office @ night… Thinking hard about life… How it changed….. 😦

BEST DAYS OF MY LiFe….!!!

1. On being Late:

“Kab shuru hui class?”

“Attendance ho gayi kya??”

“Kal raat der tak gappe marte rahe yaar”

“Aab nind nahi khuli to mein kya karu……… bolna ……. kal kya padaya tha isne”

“Ek page de na………. abey pen bhi to de, nahi to kisse likhunga…….”

” koi subah kaise aa sakta hai……..”

“wo bhi iss class ke liye ”

2. During the lecture:

“Yesss!!!! Sirrr…….The answer is ….huuuummmmm…….aaaaaaaa………….”

“No sir…..I know the answer ……sir….”

“Saala apne aapko Newton samajta hai”

“Abe lecture ko maar goli….. Anjali kya lag rahi hai aaj……..”

“Uski tshirt pe kya likha hai dekh”

“Uske bagal mein nahi baith sakta tha kya…….gadha…….”

“Kya bore kar raha hai. Bola tha canteen chalte hain ..”

“Heads, we go canteen , Tails, we go now!!!”

3. Lab:

“Expt. 2 likha??”

“last time tu aaya the kya?””

“Karna kya hai??”

“Yeh bhai…..merko pata hota to tere pass kyon aata……..”

“Areee tu to bura maan gaya …….chal dikha na…..bhau kyo kata hai….”

4. Sessionals Test:

“sessionals test???? ……Aree yaar…… ”

“Kya……. abe unit test mein itna sara topic hai to final mein kya hoga….”

“Oye Sushil kaha hai……uska roll number mere baad hai…….wo nahi aaya to mein pakka fail….”

After test……

“yaar pada tha….recall nahi kar paya…….chhod na ……. Canteen chalega…” SAHI !!

5. For attendance

“I was in the class, attendence bolna bhool gaya ”

“Oye usko thoda khush kar list se tera naam hata dega……..”

“Bola tha proxy regularly maar…….. Saale tera class karne ka kya faida hua…..”

6. Late submission of assignments:

” Maine us ko bola thaa ki copy karke mera assgnment bhi saath mein submit kar dena”

“Ab mein kya karu usne mereko bole bina hi submit kar diya……..”

“They should allow XEROX……..sala system hi kharab hai ”

7 . After exam:

“Yeh bhi syllabus mein thaa kya? Shitt…”

“kya bol raha hai yaar..aise karna tha kya”

“1st mein 3 marks…..2nd mein 0…….3rd mein 2…….Gaya……….fail pakka…….”

“Yaar notice lagte hi hata dena……..wo kya soochegi mera marks dekh kar……”

8 . VIVA (b4 exam):

“Submission ab tak hua nahi hai , VIVA kya ghanta doonga”

“Aeee…….Akash…..terese kya kya poocha….mood kaisa hai..”

“External ke ghar mein bacche nahi hai kya…….”

“Dekh Boss!! external bhi aadmi hai. Usko pata hai students ki ab tak preparation nahi hui hai”

9 . Submission:

“Ye bhi chhapna hai kya?”

“kaat kaat ke likh le…kaon padhta hai”

“Iska bhi print-out lena hai kya?”

“Jai ho computer baba ki……jai ho Ctrl C – Ctrl V ki…….”

“Tujhe Sir ka sign aata hai kya?”

10 .Copying Assignments:

“Ye tune kya likha hai????”

(The best one)

“Jo word samajh mein aa raha hai woh likh, jo nahi samajh mein aa raha hai uska drawing nikal”

“Phir bhi, kuch to idea hoga??”

” Maine uska likha hai, mera assignment check ho gaya, tu bhi wohi kar.”

“Koi hint……..”

“Are baba ghaseet de……..na tu samjega na wo……..”

11. Exam:

“Jo (mujhe) aata hai, woh (paper mein)aata nahi hai; jo nahi aata hai woh NAHI aata hai”  ..VERY VERY TRUE !!

“ye question 2 saal se nahi poochha hai yaar….to ab kya poochenge”

“ye last time hi poochha thaa……is baar nahi aana chahiye”

“tere paas is ke notes hai??”

“Neend aa rahi mujhe to…thodi der so jata hoo..utha diyo pakka”

“woh chapter… mark weightage 6 marks… (facial ex-pressions speaks the story)”

“nahi samjha to rat le” – PERFECT ONE

“Iss paper mein roll number ke kya order hai……..”

“Ek aur din ka gap de dete to kya 3rd World War ho jata tha kya………” I AGREE !! !!

This one is dedicated to all my friends:

“bas ek bar wapas lautne ka man karta hai

Aaj har wo din jeene ko man karta hai.

kuch buri batein jo ab acchi lagti hain

kuch batein jo kal ki hi batein lagti hain.

abki baar class attend karne ka man karta hai

Dopahar ki class mein aakhein band karne ko man karta hai.

Doston ke room ki wo baatein yaad aati hai

exam ke time pe wo hasi mazak yaad aati hai,

college ke paas Jaggi ka dhabe ki yaad aati hai

tab ki bekar lagne wali photos chehre pe hasi laati hai.

Apni galtiyon pe tumse daat khana yaad aata hai.

Par tumhari galti dekhne ka ab bhi mann karta hai.

Ek aisi subah uthne ka mann karta hai

bas ek bar wapas lautne ka man karta hai.

bas ek bar aur

wapas lautne ka man karta hai.”

Four friends, have a good laugh

Four friends, who hadn’t seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party.After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids.

The first guy said, “My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel.

He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he’s the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday.”

The second guy said, “Darn, that’s terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, and then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He’s so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday.”

The third man said: “Well, that’s terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion.”

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked: “What are all the congratulations for?” One of the three said: “We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. ….What about your son?”

The fourth man replied: “My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.”

The three friends said: “What a shame…what a disappointment.”

The fourth man replied: “No, I’m not ashamed. He’s my son and I love him. And he hasn’t done too bad either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends.  !!!!!!!

BEING IN TWENTIES – SOMETHING

I considered this mail as just another forward till i read it. Worth a read atleast once.. What do u say ??

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn’t know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don’t recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren’t really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job… and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you’re doing this because you know that you aren’t a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself… and while winning the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

We call it the “Quarter-life Crisis.”

Send this to your twenty-something friends… maybe it will help someone feel like they aren’t alone in their state of confusion…


FATE DETERMINES WHO COMES INTO OUR LIVES…..HEART DETERMINES WHO STAYS

21 reasons y FRIENDS are better than GirlFriend / BoyFriend

Seriously Guys, there is nothing better than being single.. i so miss it 😦 

read on to find why i think friends are better than your BF/GF .

1.You don’t have to call them every day, just to let them know you’re not fighting

2.You don’t have an anniversary-you just sort of “became” best friends.

3.When someone calls your girlfriend/boyfriend your “partner” it makes you think of marriage. When they call your best friend our partner, it’s more like cops.

4.You never have to touch your best friend when it’s hot outside, but you can still huddle close when it’s freezing.

5.Your parents usually like your best friend.

6.Your best friend doesn’t care if you get fat, you’re ugly, or if you get a ard haircut.

7.You don’t have to get jealous of “girls only” night or “guys only” night — You’re part of it!

8.You can laugh at your best friend with no consequences.

9.You can burp/fart in front of your best friend on any occasion.

10.You can plan on still having a relationship with your best friend in 20 years.

11.Never in your life will you need “space” from your best friend.

12.Your best friend won’t be mad if you want some time alone, and will only ask you “what’s wrong?” once.

13.Your best friend is someone you get in trouble with; your boyfriend/girlfriend is someone you get in trouble with if you get in trouble.

14.You don’t have to get dressed up to go anywhere with your best friend.

15.You’re allowed to have multiple best friends.

16.No one ever spreads rumors or talks about you and your best friend’s relationship.

17.Borrowing any amount of money from your best friend is okay, no questions asked.

18.Your best friend will never refer to you as “the ball and chain,” “the old lady/man,” or “the whip.”

19.No one is ever trying to fix you up on blind dates for a new best friend.

20.It doesn’t matter what your “other” friends think about your best friend.

21. Your best friend is the first person you call when you get a new boy friend / girl friend, and when you break up with them

The 4-year holiday called Engineering (How True…)

20 things common to all Engineering colleges:

1). The lecturers dont teach.The students dont study.The only guy who
benefits is the one who owns the ‘dhaba’ next to the college.

2). Rules are made to be broken.

3). Promises are made to be broken.

4). Deadlines are made to be extended…ALWAYS!

5).Guys always think the chics in the college next lane are more beautiful.

6).The geeks are the most pampered lot during the internal exams.

7).The lab assistants are the most respected people(during the lab exams i.e)

8).The watchmen are the people most bribed.

9).The HOD is the person most respected(heights of sycophancy here).

10).The principal is the person most abused and insulted(behind the back i.e)

11).Dropping subjects is ‘cool’.(arre yaar..drop the idea of dropping subjects plzz).

12).There is always a lecturer in the college who cant speak proper ‘english’.

13). Night-out is the second most important tool to ace the exams.

14).The most important tool..the bhramastra..is the ‘chit’ in which the
words can be understood only by the person who wrote them(in most of thecases i.e)

15).The freshers are the most sought after..be it in the canteen,the ‘free’
periods or for completing the records,assignments.

16).The second-years are the ones with the ‘I am the don-of-the-college’ feeling.

17).The third years are the ones with the ‘so-many-backlogs’ feeling and the poor
souls get down to studying after bossing around in the college for so
long.but the fun still continues ..

18).The fourth years have no connection with the college whatsoever…with
no interest in ragging,pulling each other`s legs,the bday parties,the bday
bums et al which they enjoyed so much till now.All they want is a good
placement and a ‘1st-class’ tag attached to their memo.

19).The first three years are spent in cursing the college,the people there,the system et al.

20).But towards the end of the fourth year ,people tend to feel nostalgic abt the pure unadulterated fun they have had for 4 years.Now the very system they disliked,the very canteen they cursed,the time that they spent there,the bday bums they suffered..all these seem like heaven to them.