BEING IN TWENTIES - SOMETHING

I considered this mail as just another forward till i read it. Worth a read atleast once.. What do u say ??

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn’t know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren’t exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don’t recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren’t really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job… and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn’t. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can’t meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you’re doing this because you know that you aren’t a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself… and while winning the race would be great, right now you’d just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

We call it the “Quarter-life Crisis.”

Send this to your twenty-something friends… maybe it will help someone feel like they aren’t alone in their state of confusion…

FATE DETERMINES WHO COMES INTO OUR LIVES…..HEART DETERMINES WHO STAYS

Important Lesson

LESSON: If opportunity doesn’t knock the door; open the door and drag opportunity inside. Look below @ the example

Thumbs Up Spoof

Pepsi [Youngistan Ad Spoof]

Spoofed:

Original Ad:

TV Advertisement Spoofs

Hi !

Writing after a long time… This being the 100th post, i wante to it to be outrageously funny.. but havent come up with any as yet :-(  .

Coming back to the title of the post, the recent Pepsi advertisement on Akshay Kumar’s Thumbs Ad has started the Spoof War between the two cola giants once again. [ If u remember, some time back salman khan was spoofed by Pepsi.. I ll try to get the video over here]

So I decided to make available the funny spoof advertisements here along with the original ones. Hope you all enjoy this section too…

New Professional Management FUNDAS

Some of the modern day meanings of replies you might get from your management. Nice One ! Enjoy

1.”We will do it” means “You will do it”

2.”You have done a great job” means “More work to be given to you”

3.”We are working on it” means “We have not yet started working on the
same”

4.”Tomorrow first thing in the morning” means “Its not getting done
“At least not tomorrow!”

5.”After discussion we will decide-I am very open to views” means “I
have already decided, I will tell you what to do”

6.”There was a slight miscommunication” means “We had actually lied”

7.”Lets call a meeting and discuss” means “I have no time now, will
talk later”

8.”We can always do it” means “We actually cannot do the same on time”

9.”We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension
of the deadline” means “The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver
on time.”

10.”We had slight differences of opinion “means “We had actually
fought”

11.”Make a list of the work that you do and let’s see how I can help
you” means “Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me”

12.”You should have told me earlier” means “Well even if you told me
earlier that would have made hardly any difference!”

13.”We need to find out the real reason” means “Well I will tell you
where your fault is”

14.”Well Family is important; your leave is always granted. Just
ensure that the work is not affected,” means, “Well you know…”

15.”We are a team,” means, “I am not the only one to be blamed”

16.”That’s actually a good question” means “I do not know anything
about it”

17.”All the Best” means “You are in trouble”

PRICELESS WORDS (ITS AWESOME)

A husband wakes up at home with a huge hangover.
He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple
of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table.
He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless,
clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table.
“Honey, breakfast is on the table, I left early to go grocery shopping.
Love You!”

Totally shocked with the note , he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there
is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper.
His son is also at the table, eating. He asks, “Son, what happened last
night?”
His son says, “Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious.
Broke some crockery, puked in the hall, and gave yourself a black eye when
you stumbled into the door”. Confused, the man asks, “So, why is everything
in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?
I should expect a big quarrel with her!”
His son replies, “Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she
tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said,

“LADY LEAVE ME ALONE! I’M MARRIED!“

Moral
Self-induced hangover - $ 400.00
Broken crockery - $ 800.00
Breakfast - $ 10.00
Saying the Right Thing While Drunk - “PRICELESS “

There are truly some things that both money and Mastercard can’t buy

Funny sayings …

“U love someone
U marry someone else.

The one u marry
becomes ur wife or husband

And the one u loved
becomes the password of ur mail id”

—————

There’s only one perfect child in the world & every mother has it.

There’s only one perfect wife in the world & every neighbor has it.

—————

Three dreams of a man:

To be as handsome as his mother thinks.

To be as rich as his child believes.

To have as many women as his wife suspects…

—————

Husband & wife are like liver and kidney. Husband is the liver & wife the kidney.

If the liver fails, the kidney fails. If the kidney fails, the liver manages with other kidney.

—————

Generation Next Motto: Na hum shaadi karenge, na apne bachchon ko karne denge.

—————

What’s the diff between Dava & Daru?

Dava is like a girlfriend, that comes with an expiry date and

Daru is like a wife, Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

—————

Wife ko Begum kyon kehte hain?

Kyonki shaadi ke baad saare gum to husband ke hisse mein aate hain or
wife Be-Gum ho jaati hai.

—————

The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutter speed
it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut!

Breaking News !!! Part 1

Hi… the other day I recieved two mails depicting the disgusting state of our News Channels and their style of reporting…

Check this out and do leave your comments.

April Fool ! Nice One…

I know i am late in posting this, but newayz … Enjoy

Force India F1 - 2008 Race Calendar

Force India F1 - 2008 Race Calendar

Bottle of Wine.. A must read..

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it’s a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in Mysterious ways. After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers.

The woman says, “So, you’re a man. That’s interesting. Wow, just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but we’re unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should be friends and live in peace for the rest of our days”.

Flattered, the man replies, “Oh yes, I agree completely, this must be a sign from God! But you’re still at fault… women shouldn’t be allowed to drive.”

The woman continues, “And look at this, here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn’t break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.”

She hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman.

The woman takes the bottle, puts the cap back on and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, “Aren’t you having any?”

The woman replies, “No. I think I’ll just wait for the police….”

MORAL OF THE STORY: Women are clever. Don’t mess with them.

Superb Quotes !!

Long back,
a person who sacrificed his sleep,
forgot his family,
forgot his food,
fogot laughter were called
“Saints”

But now they are called..

“IT professionals“

—————————————————————————-
An interesting line written at the back of a Biker’s T Shirt:

“ If you are able to see this, Please tell me that my girlfriend has fallen off“

—————————————————————————-
Most Relationships fail not because of the absence of love..

Love is always present..

Its just that,
One loves too much,

and

The other loves too many,

—————————————————————————-
Employee: Boss, Now i have got married..! Please increase my salary..!

BOSS: Factory is not responsible for accidents occuring outside the company..!

—————————————————————————-

Philosophy of life
At the begining of married life, every gal treats her husband as GOD,

Later on somehow the alphabets got reversed..!

—————————————————————————-
What is a Fear?
Fear is the Deep, Wrenching feeling in your stomach
When pages of your book still smell new

and

Just few hours left for your exams..!

—————————————————————————-
Jus4Fun
Someone has rightly said, “A fool can ask More questions that a wise man cannot answer“

No Wonder why so many of us speechless when lecturers ask question..!

—————————————————————————-
Girl: Do you have Cards with sentimental Love quotes?

Shopkeeper: Oh sure..@! How about this card, it says “To the only boy I ever loved.!“

Girl: Thats good, Give me 12 of them..!

—————————————————————————-
After reading the form filled by an applicant.. The employer said: ” WE do have an opening for you..!

Applicant: What is it?

Interviewer: Its called the “door..!”

—————————————————————————-
A Banner cum Sign Board In front of an IT company..

Drive Slowly, Dont kill our Employee…

….. Leave them to us

Funny Marriage qotes

1. If it wasn’t for pick-pockets I’d have no sex life at all.

2. My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

3. My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.

4. With my wife I don’t get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to ‘the best woman a man ever had.’ The waiter joined me.

5. My wife was afraid of the dark…then she saw me naked and now she’s afraid of the light.

6. I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.

7. I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.

8. My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.

9. We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

10. What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

Woody Allen on Marriage..

11. I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.

12. Basically my wife was immature. I’d be at home in the bath and she’d come in and sink my boats.

13. In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

14. When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife. -Prince Philip

15. “I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence?
George Carlin quotes

16. Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
Irwin Corey quotes

17. “Getting married for sex is like buying a 747 for the free peanuts”
-Jeff Foxworthy

18. “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.”
-Groucho Marx

19. By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.
More funny Socrates quotes

20. “The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.” -H.V. Prochnow

21. “I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.” -Lyndon B. Johnson

22. “The total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution.” -Bertrand Russell

23. “It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.” -Robert Frost

24. I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something’s wrong with me.

25. Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage. William Shakespeare quotes

Funny Resignation Letters Part 3

Director of Corruptive Affairs

The Office of Non-Compliance

Re: Resignation Letter

Dear Director,

As per our legal contract, it is in my duty to present to you a letter of resignation.

While working for the Office of Non-Compliance Association, I realized being punctual, never absent, well groomed, easy going, and just being a proficient employee holds no importance to you. I know this because in my first month, it was very evident when you called me in your office and recommend I wear “makeup” because I’m a woman. Well anyway, everyone in the office knows you secretly wear “makeup” among other things yourself. I hope for your sake your equally pretentious superficial wife doesn’t find out.

Also, I can honestly say I’m ecstatic about leaving this company. Watching you bounce and parade around the office pretending to know what you were doing was more nauseating than my stomach could bear. I have never worked anywhere before that made me check my mail everyday hoping for jury duty, or waking up every morning in hopes of finding pink eye or chicken pox in the mirror. Furthermore, we all know this company will be sold to new CEO’s this year. You will in fact be out of a job very shortly. Not only because of your political ties, but mainly because of your inadequacy and idiotic incompetence. Especially when you go in front of the monthly committee to answer simple questions you don’t seem to have the intellectual capacity to comprehend much less respond with.

I really pity you as a Director. You should have been paying more attention to your work statistics, weekly reports and your unethical staff. Instead you were busy instigating corruption in your office, as well as focusing on why I don’t want to wear makeup. Now, l really don’t expect you to give me a perverse recommendation when my future job inquiries call you. Also, don’t even make attempts on framing me up on any of your illegal on goings in the office out of spite. Just in case, I will have my attorney call you periodically to test you on your already failed integrity. Keep in mind it’s illegal if you do any of the above or threaten bodily harm. If you slip up, I can press charges or civilly sue you. However, being you won’t have any financial assets by then, due to that investigation that’s being held against you. You may resort to using that same “make-up” theory while you’re sitting in prison.

Sincerely,

The best worker you would have ever had.